Lying Children – Whoops! But it wasn’t me!

Most parents/ guardians try to bring up their children to be good citizens, truthful and to respect themselves and others: what do you do when your child lies? No one wants lying children, but how can you help your child? Well don’t panic, stay calm and breathe.
Now you know the type of lying children I’m talking about:
‘No I didn’t eat the cookies’
‘Then why do you have crumbs all over your mouth?’
‘No, I did not spray perfume over the floor, on my little brother and in the cat’s tray!’
‘Well, why do your hands reek of perfume?’

Most children will tell tall stories, and this is especially the case between the ages of 3 to 5. However the good news is that you can help your child, and in most cases lying children will normally just grow out of it. I honestly believe that between the ages of 2 to 5 years old, children really do not understand the truth between fact and fiction, and so it is inevitable that they will tell exaggerated stories, which in their mind appear to be the absolute truth!

Lying children at this age, between 2-5 years old, can be due to the them trying to make sense of the world around them and understanding new information. However, it is important that you help your child by encouraging them to understand the differences between telling the truth and lying. Make sure that they realise that lies are not acceptable.
5 ways to help your child tell the truth:

1: The best role model for a child is their parents/guardians, so be sure to tell the truth and be honest in front of them. Your ‘little’ lies only serve to reinforce that it is ok to lie to get out of a situation and can encourage lying children.
2: Create an environment where your child understands that they can come to you; if your child feels that they will not be harshly punished then they are more likely to tell the truth rather than lie.
3: Help your child by not labelling them as a liar. Try to explain to them that you know that they don’t tell lies and ask what it is that is making them lie about a situation. Focus on the behaviour and not your child.
4: Encourage and help your child to tell the truth, by explaining to them that you value the truth more than the lie. You could also give a reward when they tell the truth.
5: Avoid direct confrontation that makes it inevitable for your child to tell a lie. Rather than saying, ‘Johny why did you swing the cat around by its tail?’ say ‘Johnny you know that you’re not supposed to swing the cat around by its tail.’
There is a fantastic audio book, which is also available in print, by Lauren Child which is a must for all young children. This is a wonderful tale of Lola who just cannot resist touching things she shouldn’t and ends up having to tell a lie, as the title says ‘Whoops! But it wasn’t me!’ This is great as a way to explain and help your child understand lying!